Chinese Girlfriend

Occasionally, Koop will get random SMS text messages or unsolicited messages on WhatsApp which tend to be originating from an account posing as an attractive Chinese lady with the intent on phishing for personal information and/or probably scamming for money after a certain point via offshoot investments in Bitcoin clones and various other means. They'll start conversation, generally, by seeming to have reached out to Koop by accident and then follow up with a series of "we can be friends" messages to keep conversation going until they start asking to switch the conversation to a more encrypted chat application where they dig deeper into trying to work their scam. He refers to these scammers as his "Chinese Girlfriends," given their frequent implied country of origin, and their additional (although 100% fake) intentions of starting a romantic relationship with Koop. Koop takes these interactions as an invitation to craft strange personas of himself during conversations with the "Chinese Girlfriend" ranging from a stuffed pickle salesman, to a corn inspector, to a shoe aglet and grommet engineer, to various other trades that questionably exist and tries to keep the conversation going as long as possible to waste as much time of scammer as possible while increasingly making the fictional livelihood of Koop more surreal. Koop will then share these conversations with chat.